Monday, March 12, 2012

Heartbroken. Here is a real slice of life.

My son Kobe is 13 now. Last summer he said, "Mom, I would like to spend more time with Dad. I want to live with him and come here every other weekend." Oh man! That killed me. :( I have dealt with it since then. The most hurtful part of it is that he has spent more time with his step mom than me. The worst though is that I and others have caught her saying things like, "My son Kobe..." Okay, she is his STEP mom; I get that. But she is NOT his mother. I am a good mom who works hard for my kids. Kobe is my baby and I am jealous for my children. Shouldn't every mother bear be? To make it worse, his dad has been working second shift for the last three months so I have tried to insist he stay with me during the week now. He still wants to go to his Dads and stay through the week. :'( I have tried to give it to God and pray but it hurts so bad. I have thought about making him stay with me, but that will only make him resent me. How do I release this and heal from it? Kobe acts like it is no big deal. He even bypassed me on Valentines and gave a Carnation to her after one of his wrestling meets. The team got them to give to their mothers. HELP!
Well, it looks like I am out of the running. I used up my 3 allowed misses for posting on the Two Writing Teachers site, and missed Saturday. So I gave up posting on their site, but I will continue to blog because it is fun. :) I work at Milford Elementary and the first block was able to take a look at my blog. They wrote responses to my blog and I was given many wonderful comments and questions. I like how they all thought Kobe flapping his arms like a bird was funny and how they want to know more about it. I will try to upload a video if I can find one. Some of you wanted to know more out about Kobe and Natalie. Many of you said you can relate to their sibling rivalry. So sad, but at least I know it is somewhat normal for them to act like they do. For those of you who wanted to know more, I forgot another funny story about Kobe. He was two and his dad was holding him on the couch. I was cooking dinner, and I called into the living room to ask Jamie, Kobe's Dad, a question and he didn't answer me. I walked into the living room and Jamie was knocked out with Kobe in his lap, lightly slapping his face saying dad! He head butted him and gave him a mild concussion! The ambulance had to be called! Kobe use to do a lot of things Natalie did. They are only 21 months apart. Natalie is the one who "taught" Kobe how to dribble a ball. He just watched her and he did it. When Kobe was 8 months old he climbed a ladder to a loft and shimmied himself half way down the edge of the wall before I found him. He was only out of my sight for literally two minutes! He was 8' up and was just hanging there holding on the a 1\2" edge. I KNOW there was something there holding him. He could have died if he fell. Lou Flew was about a bunny who chewed gum. Thank you for all of the interesting questions! :)

Friday, March 9, 2012

13 years!

Today was my son, Kobe's 13th birthday. It's hard to believe that my "baby" is that old. I think back to when he was in diapers, starting preschool, and all of those other mile stones and it is hard to believe how quickly the time goes. Some of my memories of Kobe...when he was an infant-toddler, he would flail his arms when he was excited. They would flap as if he were going to take flight! I couldn't get him off of a bottle until the week before his 3rd birthday. His favorites thing was his blue blanket and his bunny/bear. He had beautiful curly blonde hair. His first word was Dad. He was never unhappy. His favorites story, that I had to read every night until he was 7 was Lou Flew. He was bouncing a basketball at 2 years old and he was afraid if fireworks. He walked at 11 months old. I could go on but I won't. :-) Happy Birthday my teenage boy. I love you! There is nothing as rewarding and painful as being a parent.

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Wrestling meet

It's always a bummer when you go to watch your son wrestle but they don't have his weight class. :-( Go Warriors! :-)

Not going to make it...

I woke up this morning with a sore throat and major sniffles. I've had my share of allergies and stomach flu this year, but I thought I may get through winter without strep throat or a severe sinus infection. Today feels like more than just allergies. :-(

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Just want to stay home...

I'm pretty sure, but I don't think there is one evening that I get home and just get to stay home. So tired of running.

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Like mother, like son.

When I was young, and even not so young, I was afraid of the dark. I would have been caught crawling into bed with my parents into middle school, and I slept with a night light well into high school. Even now I don't like to be at home alone at night. :) Tonight my almost 13 year old son told me he doesn't like sleeping alone because he, "sees ghosts or shadows and it scares him." Bless his heart. :( His big mean 15 year old sister won't let him sleep in her room, even though she has two double beds. So, guess where he ends up? Yep, with mom and pseudo step dad. It's okay though. Soon it will end and I may feel an emptiness in our king size bed.
-To all you soft hearted mothers and kids with sympathetic parents. Your not alone. :-)